Time Played: 3 hours

Last played: 7/6/2016

Please, Don’t Touch Anything: Oops…

There is definitely more to Please, Don’t Touch Anything than meets the eye. This little puzzle game is a massive layer cake of outright obscure and obtuse objectives, obfuscated by overwhelmingly specific orders of operations. When you first play this game there isn’t very much available to interact with. All you see is a large white console and sitting in the center of said console is a seductive red button; you can either press it, or do nothing. If you choose to defy the command given to you, the console begins to unravel, or even bloom, into an impossibly complex machine with additional methods of input — or even strange other-worldly contents…

And when I say that the order of operations, which is how each puzzle is solved, are overly complex… Well that’s the selling point here.

Unfortunately for myself I started playing Please, Don’t Touch Anything at 3am; meaning my brain probably wasn’t up to stuff at the time. I managed to figure out about five or six different puzzles without help… I then turned to the internet. I don’t know how you, the player, are supposed to figure these out on your own. They are so incredibly specific and cryptic that it’s impossible to imagine someone could figure them out without a large amount of dedication and work. I’m talking continental maps with red string levels of dedication.

The thing about them is that despite being incredibly cryptic… Almost every puzzle’s solution is staring you in the face. You just have to be able to put the pieces together with the information at hand.

It’s quite the interesting experience.

Along with the devilishly difficult puzzles the game has a really great soundtrack. The game’s songs aren’t much more than ambient flavour for the background. But each one sets a great mood for what’s going on… And I would love to be more specific but I don’t want to spoil anything… What I can say is that the game has a pleasing style, pretty good 2D graphics, and is very well animated.

Normally Please, Don’t Touch Anything is $4.99 on Steam. But I also believe it is available on mobile (iOS and Android) as well.

If you’re interested and enjoy puzzles, you’ll like this game. I don’t know if I can justify the full five dollar price tag, but I got it on sale for ninety-nine cents and I think it was definitely money well spent.

Check it out.

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