Crysis pt2

If you read my last post about Crysis you could probably tell that I thought the multiplayer was amazing.

‘Cause it was.

The Multiplayer was amazing

The analogy of it being a Battlefield game with superpowers is really quite true. There were VTOLs, helicopters, humvees, tanks that came in many flavors including: original, gaussnuclear, and black hole, mobile supply vehicles, hovercraft, boats… it was really impressive.

I could never really get the hang of using the Helicopters but I knew people that once they had enough money…

Oh yeah, the game worked on a Counter-Strike-esque system of “pay”. The better you did/longer you played, you would rank up and earn an increasing “starting pay” on each spawn (Your account would also increase on a per kill basis), that allowed you to buy weapons, weapon mods like scopes, laser pointers, incendiary bullets, vehicles, etc. Otherwise you had to improvise!

… They could get a Helicopter and just destroy the other team, relentlessly raining death upon them with missiles while simultaneously transporting players around the map. Good times…


There are two memories I have of Crysis that I would like to share with you.

One of the best memories I have of Crysis’ multiplayer is of when I was showing my friend how everything worked. He was watching me assault a ‘war factory‘ (Vehicle Garage). Now, before I go into detail of my complete and utter domination of the enemy team, here is a crude MSpaint map of the war factory and its surroundings to help give you a mental picture of the area… yes I drew you a map.


Now, I have stolen a work truck and am speeding my way down a dirt road headed directly towards the respawn bunker. I make no indication that I am going to stop as I am hurdling towards the brick wall standing between the parking lot and myself.

My friend says, “Ugh dude, you’re gonna hit the wall.” Somewhat puzzled as to what I am about to do.

Trust me.” I replied.

Just before my truck hits the dirt ramp leading up to one of the blown out sections of the wall near the bunker I bail out, launching myself from the truck as it, now driver-less, flies through the air hitting the bunker and landing in the parking lot. Before I can even hit the ground, I activate my cloak and land in a prone position. I begin to crawl towards the hole in the wall, being cautious not to move too fast, or too slow. The enemies currently occupying the war factory throw a grenade out the window at the truck. It explodes as I hide behind a dumpster, letting my energy recharge before re-cloaking.

I then make my way to the back of the war factory, and climb a staircase up to the roof. I walk over to the sky light, and throw a flash bang and a frag grenade through the sky light. They go off within a second of each other, killing one enemy. I drop through the window, shooting the other in the chest with my shotgun killing him. Now at this point I immediately activate my super speed and run my ass back to the roof. Why? Well because they’re gonna respawn back at the bunker, and they’re gonna be pretty pissed. I run back up to the skylight, go prone and let my energy recharge. I hear them open the front door and lob grenades into the building. After the explosions they begin to search the building for their cloaked killer. I then proceed to flash bang them again, dropping back down and killing one enemy with the shotgun and another with a face punch.

Now this time I stay in the building, running to the back exit and hiding on top of a shelf. I cloak up again and wait for them to return; all the while I’m taking the war factory for my team. This time one of them comes through the back entrance, uncloak, shotgun, super speed, run to roof, skylight, murder other guy, drop down, take war factory. Now that I have the factory I can buy claymores, more grenades, a sniper rifle, a 10x magnification scope…

So I plant claymores at both entrances and run back to the roof. This time instead of the skylight I use my super strength to jump up onto one of the raised portions of the roof. I go prone, and wait… I hear the first claymore go off. The other guy is inside looking for me; he goes out the front and comes up to the roof. Luckily he doesn’t see me as he scans the roof looking for an invisible murderer. Eventually he stops around the sky light, looking down into the war factory.

I jump down and shotgun him to death.

The other guy respawns and runs into the other claymore…

They didn’t come back after that…

My friend says to me, “Dude, you just Jack bauer’d these guys!

Afterwards I was able to take the bunker preventing them from respawning there. After that I just hung out on the top part of the roof shootin’ dudes with my sniper rifle…

As for the other memory…

well it’s actually hilarious.

I’m driving in a North Korean humvee (as an American I should add) as fast as it will carry me towards the war factory mentioned previously. I notice a North Korean soldier running in the road. He sees me, enters strength mode and continues running towards me.

It’s now a game of chicken.

Before I can mow him down he leaps into the air, the Nano-Suit power sending him hurdling high into the sky.

He lands gracefully on the ground, right in front of my humvee. The very second he touched the ground I ran him over. And I produced a sound somewhat like this.


Not everything was awesome though… (Except it was)

Despite many epic moments during the multiplayer matches, I can say that while playing Crysis I had one of the most embarrassing moments (at least it felt that way at the time) in my gaming career. Imagine this, you’re doing really, really well. Your team has captured most of the important points on the map. They have 100% of the resources needed to build a tank capable of shooting a massive black hole of death. You build it, you fight your way to the enemy base, you drive up the side of a mountain, position yourself perfectly. You’re going to win, the North Americans are gonna stomp those evil North Koreans! You fire the black hole and watch as it slowly falls into the center of the Korean’s base engulfing it in the blackness of the void. You’re so proud of yourself…

Wait, why didn’t the game end?

“Wow dude, your aim is so good!”

“Direct hit man!”

“GG bro”


…. And then you realize… You were North Korean the whole time…


/new account

/new name

/rejoin server

/join NK team

This time…. it’s personal.

It’s actually pretty funny

I love Crysis… and after writing these I honestly have thought about cracking it open and re-installing it on my computer!

Except… SecuROM … sucks…

As someone that doesn’t trust SecuROM this should be a testament to how good this game is, I almost installed it anyway.

But alas…

I hope you enjoyed reading about my utter domination of the North Koreans… or was it the Americans…

I certainly enjoyed writing it!

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